欲情 第一季 第一集
Repack
Michael Strathmore. Michael Strathmore.
嗨 Joce Oh, hi, Joce.
哦 是的 我正在路上 Oh, yeah. Yeah, I'm on my way.
我有点迟了 I'm a little... caught up.
可能无法准时到达募捐现场了 Might not get to the fund-raiser on time,
但是 but hey...
先生 先生 你能听见我吗 Sir? Sir, can you hear me?
闭上眼睛 Cover your eyes.
我要在爆炸前把你弄出来 好吗 I'm gonna get you out before you blow, okay?
嗯 没问题 Yeah, no problem.
是的 Joce 我很乐意继续聊 Y-yeah, Joce, I'd love to stay on and chat,
但是有人说我可能会爆炸 but I'm told I may blow.
你能呼吸吗 Can you breathe?
你没事吧 You okay?
是的 我很好 Yeah, I'm okay.
- 你叫什么名字 - Michael Michael Strathmore - What's your name? - Uh, Michael... Michael Strathmore.
出了什么事 What happened?
有个人在我前面突然转向 我就猛打方向盘 Uh, some guy swerved in front of me, and I jerked the wheel.
你太幸运了 要不然可能更加糟糕 You're lucky. It could have been a lot worse.
不 不 那是我的车吗 No. No! Is that my car?!
它可是个经典版 It's a classic.
哦 现在它成烟灰缸了 先生 Well, it's an ashtray now, sir.
哦 或许我能修好它 我也不知道 Oh, well, maybe I could fix it up.I don't know...
- 喷喷车漆 打理下皮革内饰 谁知道呢 - 好吧 让我把你挪到那边去 - Some bondo, a little leatherwork, who knows? - Okay. Well, let's take you over there.
好了 我们到那儿去 来这儿 All right. Let's go there.Come here.
好的 小心头 Okay, watch your head.
好的 Okay.
感觉疼吗 有伤口吗 Any pain? Cuts?
我想 我没事儿 I'm... okay, I guess.
警官 Officer...
Campano Campano?
嗯 谢谢你 Uh, thank you.
你救了我的命 You saved my life.
这不是问题 先生 这是我的工作 我很专业 Not a problem, sir.It's my job. I'm a professional.
看起来你没啥事情 Looks like you did okay.
我们好了吗 Are we done?
我得去个地方 I got to be at a thing.
她会理解的 She'll understand.
要是不能理解 就去她的 She doesn't, fuck her.
警察都允许说去她的吗 Are cops allowed to say "Fuck"?
我说去她的了吗 Did I say "Fuck"?
是的 Yeah.
你想搭车回去还是跟我待在一起 You want to ride in back or up here with me?
这很好 This is good.
好的 我们走吧 Okay. Let's go.
你总是开这么快吗 You always drive so fast?
我只不过刚开始加速 I'm barely moving.
看看你的速度表 Looking at your speedometer,
那东西既不准确也说明不了啥问题 that's neither accurate nor descriptive.
你是干什么的 What are you?
你是什么意思 What do you mean?
你说话像个机器人 You talk like a robot.
为什么 因为我很特别吗 Why, because I'm specific?
我认为语言就应该最大限度的 清楚得表达自己 I believe language should be used to maximize... clarity.
- 最大限度的表明自己 - 是啊 - Maximize clarity? - Yeah.
你是个该死的律师 You're a fucking lawyer.
- 好极了 你对律师有成见嘛 - 老多理由了 - Great. You got something against lawyers? - A long list.
好吧 你没必要现在就提出来 Well, you needn't go into it now.
没必要 你丫是皇室成员么 "Needn't"? What, are you part of the royal family?
这才是正规的鸟语 It's correct english,
大概这就是我这么说让你会错意的原因 which is probably why it rubbed you the wrong way.
那是啥 What is that?
一只猫么 Is that a cat?
不 那是只小母牛 No, it's a cow.
你巡逻车里面怎么会有只猫 What's a cat doing in your squad car?
难道是只警猫 Is it a police cat?
咱这就是闲扯 还是你在收集证物 Is this just conversation,or are you compiling evidence
因为你很无聊 无所不能的律师大人 for your frivolous,inevitable lawsuit?
好吧 我喜欢猫 Okay. I like cats.
他的名字呢 What's its name?
Pablo Pablo.
他喜欢坐车兜风 He likes to go on rides.
我邻居Lola把他送给我的 Lola, my neighbor,gave him to me.
Lola Lola?
那是个外来的名字 That's an exotic name.
Lola是个艺术家 Lola is an artist.
她与Picasso共眠 She slept with Picasso.
道上风传她给Freud吹过喇叭 Says she blew Freud.
谁没吹过啊 Who didn't?
你给心理分析学之父吹过箫 You blow the father of psychoanalysis,
这份名声将伴随你众生 and it haunts you for the rest of your life.
那就是Lola Marquez 她给Freud吹过箫 "There goes Lola Marquez. She blew Freud."
但好的一面是 你会收到很多派对邀请 but the upside is, it gets you invited to a lot of parties.
是啊 那就是 那就是我 Yeah, that's... that's me.
那肯定很棒 穿着燕尾服开车兜风 Must be nice, driving around in a Tuxedo,
参加各项活动 going to events,
住那么牛的房子 living in a house that cool.
是也不是 Yes and no.
视野不错 但是 Great view, but...
我一个人住 I live alone.
养只骆驼 Get a llama.
或者弄架紫外线浴床 Or maybe a tanning bed...
就那些你们这样钻石王老五填房子用的东西 Whatever you lonely rich guys fill your houses with.
你现在要回去接着值班么 Are you going back on duty now?
- 我没在值班 - 那为什么要穿制服 - I'm not on duty. - Why the uniform?
问这些干嘛 Why the questions?
你 你真有点防卫过重了 You're... you're pretty defensive.
偶尔啦 Sometimes.
你给我做人工呼吸的时候 When you were giving me mouth-to-mouth...
我能说实话嘛 Can I be honest?
我其实并不需要的 I didn't really need it.
我知道 I know.
你头发里面有点风挡碎片 You have some window glass in your hair.
你有权保持沉默 You have the right to remain silent.
你所说的一切 Anything you say...
将让你付出代价 will cost you.
听着 我不是说我姐姐Liz Look, I'm not saying my sister Liz is
是世界上最容易上手的妞 the easiest person in the world,
但是她名副其实 but she's worth it.
她正好还是最性感的女人 She also happens to be one of the sexiest women
据我所知 I've ever known.
当然 我喜欢女人 Sure, I'm partial to women.
男人的生殖器看起来很恶心 吓人 The male genitalia basically revolt, terrify,
让我很难接受 and paralyze me.
当然 我认为男人在某些情况下表现抢眼 And sure, I think that men are at their best
当他们在举重物和搬东西时候 when they're picking up heavy things and moving them,
像是钢琴或者是他们的自大 like pianos or...their egos.
但是作为一个了解女人的女人来说 But as a woman who knows women,
我告诉你 这妞很有一套 I'll tell you, this chick knows stuff.
我的意思是 我和她一起长大 她总是知道 I mean, I grew up with her,and she always understood
如何深入别人的外皮内部 exactly how to get underneath another person's skin.
而且我听说 没人像Liz一样会吹箫 And the way I hear it... no one sucks a cock like liz.
你有过末梢神经 Did you ever feel your nerve endings...
猛然张开 就像 Pop open like... little...
小雨伞 Umbrellas?
你尝起来味道不错 You taste good.
我都快说不出话了 I can barely speak.
你喜欢吗 You liked it?
我被永久的改变了 I am forever changed.
大概过期了 Probably overdue.
我现在该让你走了 I should probably let you go now.
纯粹出于礼貌 Just being polite.
你干嘛不明说呢 Why don't you just say what you mean?
你知道我啥意思 You know what I mean.
那就给姐说明咯 Then say it.
飞翔的太过于靠近太阳了 不是嘛 Flew a little too close to the sun, have you?
你不打算给我打开手套嘛 Aren't you gonna uncuff me?
额 我把那钥匙放哪儿了 Hmm. Now where did I put that key?
嘿 真搞笑 你知道嘛 我还真有个东西 Hey, very funny. You know, I do have a thing...
我必须要得到的 I have to get to.
谢谢你 Thank you.
你手上有点淤痕 You're a little bruised.
你该好好看看我的灵魂 You should see my soul.
我曾在那停留过片刻 I did there for a second.
I got to go.
你果着看起来真美 You look really amazing naked.
我从没果过 只是看起来像罢了 I'm never naked. It just looks that way.
你坠入过爱河嘛 You ever been in love?
你想要了解我嘛 Are you trying to get to know me?
因为我讨厌那样 Because I hate that.
你看来还是果着的 You still look naked.
你呢 What about you?
你爱过嘛 Have you ever been in love?
我可不是一个有大爱的人 I'm not a big love guy.
不奇怪 I'm not surprised.
你偶尔也该尝试一下 You should try it sometime.
可能会让你从你那合法职业的某个阴暗角落 Might take your mind off that dark void
拜托出来 of your legal career.
你不是在指我显示生活中的琐事嘛 Don't you mean the trivia of my existence?
Michael 你可不是 One thing you're not, Michael...
微不足道的 is trivial.
- Joce - Michael - Hey, Joce. - Michael.
嘿 你没事吧 Hey.Are you okay?
我刚刚看到一辆警车离开了 I just saw a police car leaving.
我遭遇了车祸 Joce I flipped my car, Joce.
- 我本可能死掉的 - 什么 - I could have been killed. - What?
幸运的是 那名警官救了我并把我送回了家 Luckily, this officer saved me and drove me home.
我的上帝啊 Oh, my god.
他们 他们进行过深入的调查了么 Are they... are they doing a thorough investigation?
是的 他们已经开始了 Yeah. They already started.
好的好的 很好 Okay. Okay, good.
很好 Good.
我很遗憾你错过了我的演讲 I'm just sorry you missed my speech...
介绍政府官员 introducing the governor.
我打赌你棒极了 I bet you were awesome.
我本来就是 I was.
你手腕上有瘀伤 Your wrists are bruised.
这是怎么回事 How did that happen?
干我 干我 干我 Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me,
干一个警察 你真是我的英雄 a fucking cop? You're my hero.
我忒想和一名警察滚床单了 I always wanted to copulate with a cop.
谢谢你 Thank you.
那么 啥情况 说说细节 So? What was it like? Details, details.
好吧 首先 Luther她们都木有阴道 Well, for starters, Luther, they don't have vaginas.
- 她们有枪套 - 别这么对我嘛 Michael - They have holsters. - Don't do this to me, Michael.
我对女人们着迷 我渴望她们 我爱她们 I'm obsessed with women. I crave them. I love them.
我每天至少需要两个 夏令时的时候三个 I require at least two per day, three during daylight savings.
我那非同凡响的性生活跟你一点狗屁关系都木有 My phenomenal sex life is none of your fucking business.
我的主业就是滚床单 My business is fucking.
企业并购 从鸡奸一步登天啊 神啊 Mergers and acquisitions? one step up from sodomy. Jeez.
你俩咋相遇的 很黄很暴力嘛 So how'd you two meet? Was it violent?
你坐进巡逻车兜风了嘛 Did you get to ride in a squad car?
是的 如果你一定要知道的话 Yes, if you must know.
神啊 一个已婚男人勃起了 Oh, god. An intended man erect and speeding
并在斑马线上超速了 in a black-and-white,
警笛长鸣 在他前往犯罪现场的路上和那个谁一起 sirens wailing, on his way to be in flagrante delicto with...
- Luther - 啥 - Luther! - What?
我们现在能谈谈 Can we please talk about
那起商标侵权案 the trademark infringement suit now?
好吧 好吧 Fine, fine.
那你如何对待Jocelyn So what'd you do about Jocelyn?
这跟我如何对待Jocelyn无关 Doesn't matter what I did about Jocelyn.
是啊 你是对的 我想啥呢 Oh, yeah. You're right. What was I thinking?
就因为你未婚妻的老爸正好是 Just because your fiancee's father happens
这间律师事务所的创办合伙人 to be the founding partner of this law firm,
那有什么关系呢 what would it matter that
你在你迷乱的性交中背叛了他唯一的理智的女儿 you betrayed his only "sane" daughter in your coital frenzy?
好吧 Luther 那警察离开之后 我的梦魇正式上演了 Okay, Luther. The cop leaves, my nightmare officially begins.
我们太牛了 We are amazing.
神啊 一夜俩妞 美梦成真的感觉啊 God, two in one night? It's a dream come true.
不 不 那个 Luther 我 No, no. It's... it's not, Luther. I...
我感觉很内疚 I feel guilty.
我很珍视Jocelyn I care about Jocelyn.
我们都在谈婚论嫁了 We're talking about making a life together.
只是 另外这个女人 It's just this... this other woman,
我没办法解释 太疯狂了 I can't explain it. It's crazy.
好吧 我为我的迟钝道歉 Well, I apologize for my insensitivity.
谢谢 Thank you.
Michael 你说到了 疯狂 Michael, you said... "Crazy."
那意味着你陷进去了 对吗 that... means clamps, doesn't it?
你为什么不出去找点活干呢 Why don't you just go out and get yourself a job
在色情产业里面 in the porn industry?
你有门路 You know someone?
伙计们 你们好 Hello, lads.
早上好 Dellacorte先生 Morning, Mr. Dellacorte.
昨晚没在慈善晚宴上见到你啊 Missed you at the fund-raiser last night.
Jocelyn告诉我你遭遇到了一点小擦伤 Jocelyn tells me that you were in a bit of a scrape.
差不多吧 To say the least.
他真的被绊住了 He was seriously tied up.
坚持住啊 Carry on.
谢谢你 Quipmaster Thank you, Quipmaster.
哥就是干这个的 It's what I do.
这些花真漂亮 These are magnificent.
喂喂喂 你到底有没有把注意力放在这儿的任何事上 Are you paying attention to anything here?
当然了 我就在你身边嘛 Yeah, sure. I'm right with you.
Michael 我是为你才办的这个晚宴 I'm only doing this dinner party for you, Michael.
你是说为了你老爸和Snapple You mean for my father and Snapple.
Chantal Chantal.
记住顺序已经很困难了 It's hard to keep track.
啥 那她是我第七或是第八个继母了 What, is she my seventh or eighth stepmom?
对你爸 我们只能说一件事 One thing we can say for your dad,
他肯定可以去参加竞选了 he sure does throw his hat in the ring.
我们刚刚直接跳到我们马上结婚吧的话题了么 Did we shift right into "let's get married sooner" talk?
你实在太戏剧化了 You're so dramatic.
不是啊 Joce 我知道你有多想把任何事做到完美 No, Joce, I know how you like to have everything so perfect.
在工作上 我不得不一丝不苟 For my work, I have to be precise.
错误的大型衣橱 选择不慎的靠垫 The wrong armoire, an ill-chosen pillow...
在整个屋里都是种煎熬啊 the whole room suffers.
Joce 我没讨论你在装修上的事情 I'm not talking about your decorating business, Joce.
我讨论的是人生 I'm talking about life.
好吧 人生已经很混乱了 Well, life's messy enough.
我没必要多此一举 I don't have to add to the clutter.
谁会在乎麻烦呢 Who cares about clutter?
这不是 反正就是麻烦 It doesn't... it's just clutter!
Michael 哪来的麻烦啊 Michael, where is this coming from?
我身上的麻烦 It's coming from me.
不可能啊 No, it isn't.
我从来没看到过你这样 I've never seen this before.
这是你的黑暗面么 Is this your dark side?
这是我被氧化的一面 It's my... oxidized side.
我正在生锈 I'm rusting.
你意思是 我让你腻味了 You mean I'm boring you.
伦家可以改的嘛 I can change that.
不是的 Joce 不是我们的问题 No, Joce, it's... it's not about us.
是我的问题 你想知道我是什么感觉么 It's about me. You wanna know how I feel?
我感觉太TM斯文了 太循规蹈矩了 I feel... too damn polite. I feel... premeditated.
那是他们用来描述杀人犯的词吧 That's a word they use to describe murders.
我TM正尝试着告诉你 I'm trying to fucking tell you
我到底怎么了 what's going on with me.
你经历过这些么 Is any of this getting through to you?
当然了 Of course.
可你也不用说TMD吧 亲爱的 And you didn't have to say "Fucking," sweetie.
也许是我的第六次离婚吓坏了 Maybe it was my sixth divorce that scared Mikey
曾经正处在发育的小Mikey from ever gettin' close to a chick.
可能是我的错 Probably my fault.
我给他树了一个坏榜样 I set a bad example for him since most of my wives
因为我大部分老婆不是整形过的半老徐娘就是吹着泡泡糖的小P孩 were constructed of silicone and bubblegum.
老天太公平了 Fair enough.
但我确实给过他一个很伟大的建议 But I did give him one great piece of advice.
Mikey 我说到 听从你小弟弟的意见 "Mikey," I said, "Follow your dick.
你的小弟永远不会撒谎 至少不是对你 Your dick never lies, at least not to you."
如果你不听从你小弟 you don't follow your dick,
某一天它就会像坏掉的盆景一样不行了 one day it falls off like a bad bonsai tree,
当你最后躺在虚幻的某个地方 and you end up sucking bottled oxygen
吸氧气瓶的时候 somewhere in rancho mirage,
又开始感叹好日子都死哪去了 wondering where all the good times went.
听从你小弟吧 Follow your dick.
它会给你指一条明路的 It's got a perfect sense of direction.
你的卡布奇诺味道怎么样 How's your cappuccino?
无与伦比 it's fabulous. Good.
这是啥 怎么这里设计了泡沫呢 What's this, uh, design in the foam here?
噢 那就是精髓所在嘛 Oh, that's the shroud of turin.
任何朋克都能创造出一朵郁金香 Any punk can make a tulip.
Michael 别泡我老妹 Stop picking on my sister, Michael.
嗨 亲爱的 等等 这就是早上 Hi, honey. Wait, this is the guy
你告诉我跟Lola的那个男人么 you were telling me and Lola about this morning?
那是啥意思 What's that supposed to mean?
笔 事故报告 签字吧 Pen. Accident report. Sign.
给你 Here.
好吧 你去哪 Okay. Where you goin'?
我已经得到我要的东西了 I got what I needed.
神马 你是说现在 还是昨晚呢 What, now or last night?
我要走了 I gotta go.
等等 等等啊 不要嘛 拜托你了 Hold... hold on. No, no, come on.
我大中午的跑来这里 I-I-I came out here in the middle of my day
就为了给你签这些文件 to sign these papers for you.
至少要礼貌地说声再见吧 At least have the courtesy to say good-bye.
再见 Good-bye.
Campano警官 Officer Campano.
嗨 Hey.
今天早上进展如何 How'd the hearing go this morning?
这个嘛 果断笑死人了 Oh, yeah. A million laughs.
他们把我放在试用期 They put me on probation.
重金悬赏 The heavy money was on suspension.
小妞儿 你有十个犯人 You got ten lives, doll.
他是谁 Who's that?
哦 我不知道 Oh. I have no idea.
好吧 听着 反正你快点回来 好么 Okay. Look, just hurry back, all right?
嘿嘿 如果没有你 Fighting crime is just civil service
打击犯罪就跟社区服务一个样 without you, partner.
你竟然不知道 You have no idea?
我有很多想法啊 Oh, I have plenty of ideas.
为什么他们把你放在试用期啊 Why'd they put you on probation?
这根本就不算啥 It was absolutely nothing.
他们不为什么就随便把你放在试用期么 They put you on probation for absolutely nothing?
他们不喜欢我做警察 They didn't like the way I made a collar
抓坏人的方式 懂了么 on a bad guy. Okay?
嗨 你被捕了 Hey! You're under arrest.
啊哈哈 尼玛肯定开我玩笑呢 You're fuckin' kidding me.
你最好呼叫后援 You better call for backup!
你一个人在没有同事帮忙的时候 You chased after the guy
开着巡逻车 追那家伙? in your squad car without your partner?
- 他在男厕里面 - 然后你用警棍制伏了他 - He's was in the men's...- and then you subdued him with your baton?
听着 我会有点小激动 但那魂淡活该 Look, I get a little excitable, but that scumbag had it coming.
你知道什么 你到底想说啥 W... you know what? What's your point?
你需要一个律师 You need a lawyer.
我已经很多律师了 昨晚刚刚 所以 I've had lawyers, as recent as last night, so...
跟我一起吃晚饭吧 have dinner with me.
为啥 Why?
- 那吃午饭 - 哦 已经过了 - Lunch. - Oh. Pass.
- 早午餐呢 - 早午餐 我们的谈话结束了 - Brunch? - Brunch? We are done talking.
你喜欢看电影么 Do you like movies?
呃 当然了 你什么意思 Well, yeah. What do you mean?
喜欢Vin Diesel演的电影么 Like, something with Vin Diesel in it?
我从不邀请任何人去任何地方 但我正在邀请你 I never ask anybody anywhere, but I'm asking you.
半小时以后就上映 It starts in half an hour.
哎 可是我还要开会 Well, I've got meetings.
难道你有不开会的时候么 You always will.
好吧 All right.
今晚对你我来说不够甜蜜 Not enough sweet for you and me tonight...
新版的 New print.
他们新加了两个被剪去的场景 还加强的音轨 They added two missing scenes and enhanced the soundtrack.
当美女忍受着看透灵魂的时候 Oh! when beauty stands looking into the soul...
这部分很牛叉 This part rocks.
甜言蜜语太恶心人了 That sicken at pretty words.
嗯 Yes...
为了爱 for that is love.
爱 Love.
爱到不能呼吸 失去理智 I love beyond breath, beyond reason,
超越了一切爱的力量 beyond love's own power of loving.
你的名字就像我心里的一个金铃 Your name is like a golden bell hung in my heart.
当我想到你的时候 我就颤抖不已 And when I think of you, I tremble,
那个铃不断回响着 Roxane Roxane and the bell rings and rings, "Roxane! Roxane!"
天哪 Jesus.
那就是爱 That is love...
可怕又美丽的风 that wind of terrible and jealous beauty.
我嘞个擦 Fuck.
高昂又炫目的音乐 Soaring, blinding music.
亲爱的 你会带着我的快乐 变得更快乐的 Dear, you may take my happiness to make you happier,
甚至你永远不会知道我曾给过你 even though you never know I gave it to you.
每天几次啊 How many times every day?
- 你让我疯狂 - 每天 - You make me crazy. - Every day.
闭嘴 Shut up.
打扰一下 你们 你们该离开了 Excuse me? You'll... you'll have to leave.
警察办案中 把该死的灯关了 Police business. Shut that fucker off!
给姐滚出去 快走 Get out, man! Go!
喔 你PP真不错 Oh, you got a great ass.
好吧 你小弟也很不错 Well, you got a great cock.
以前从未有人这么说过 No one ever said that before.
我们走吧 Let's get out of here.
强壮又真实 Strong and true.
甜蜜 强壮有真实 Sweet and strong and true.
你本来可以处理地更好一点 You could've handled that a little better...
- 是啊 - 忒二了 - Yeah. - That Usher.
我本来可以枪杀他的 I could've shot him.
我是认真的 I'm serious.
好吧 也许我应该提起诉讼 Well, maybe I should've filed a lawsuit.
蛋定点 好么 Calm down, okay?
那是什么意思 What's that supposed to mean?
尼玛到底有啥毛病啊 What the hell's your problem?
嗨 给我回来啊 Hey. Hey, get back here.
嗨 Hey!
尼玛烦不烦 让我静一静 姐要上洗手间啊 Just leave me alone. I've gotta pee.
你气死我了 You piss me off.
扯蛋 我对你很感兴趣 Bullshit. I interest you.
你不了解我 You don't know me.
可是撮合了我俩 That makes two of us.
- 别挡姐的道 - 哼 伦家偏不让 - Get out of my way. - No.
现在你竟然敢推我了 You shove me now?!
我刚说 别挡姐的道 I said, get out of my way.
你抽风了 你到底想咋样 You're out of control. What are you gonna do?
你现在打算用手枪柄打我么 You gonna pistol-whip me now?
什么 你想戴上手铐么 就像昨晚那样 What, you want handcuffs, too, like last night?
- 别说了 - 你管我 - Stop it. - Make me!
别再说了 Stop it!
你给哥过来 Come over here.
原来这么容易的啊 That was easy.
对我来说 这太疯狂了 This is too nuts for me.
我也是 Me, too.
Liz Liz!